They Groom Horses Don’t They?

by Sherbhert Editor

A grooming experience- a novel Christmas gift from children to father. Normally associated with four-legged trotters, this grooming did not however involve slopping out stables and polishing a racehorse. Rather this gift sent a subtle message. Visit https://www.truefittandhill.co.uk in St James’ to get facial hair removed, front hooves manicured, and mane washed and sheared. So there father went. 

The grooming house compared favourably with the usual barbers’ shop: no hair on the floor; reliable and clean décor; polite people and lots of them, including one at reception; paintings of gentlemen from eras gone by, hanging and staring, looking superior. The stalls for the horses were shining chrome, and polished leather.

With trepidation, he was seated in his stall, home for the next hour. On time, groomer and manicurist arrived, and checked on Sir’s comfort. First, front hooves were placed on a towel covered cushion slightly to one side. As these parts were filed and creamed, the shampoo was applied at the top end and the mane was massaged. Manicurist inscrutable, mildly smiling, wondering “what has he done to these hooves?”, but 30 minutes later nails were even, and skin was smooth, oiled and ready to go.

Meanwhile groomer, not particularly chatty though appropriately deferential and concerned, and clearly highly experienced from various City grooming houses, showed interest: “Has Sir ever been shaved?”. In fact, this was Sir’s first time at the hands of a hired third party: shaving was a thing one did oneself. Hot towel after hot towel was applied to face and jowl, and forehead; mouth covered over, so breathing only through nostrils, when would waterboarding begin? With razor scraping skin between towel applications, the horse survived the heat. And then the hour was up, the mane was trimmed, conditioned and sleek. The face now clean and smooth, the cutthroat having been perfectly swished without a nick. Cologne splashed on; you would smell this horse before you saw him.

Then freedom, released into the wild of St. James, tossing his mane with abandon, this well-groomed thoroughbred decided he may even repeat the experience if the bank account permitted. 

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